How To Cope When Uncertainty Strikes
Although we may see the light at the end of the tunnel with the vaccine accessible to most, it’s going to take a while to shake off the trauma 2020 delivered. Uncertainty flooded our everyday lives—between not knowing when our health and safety wouldn’t be under threat, to not understanding the different restrictions state to state, to simply not knowing when our daily lives would resume to normal.
Uncertainty is never permanent.
No matter what you’re going through, this period of crisis will pass. No matter how long ago March 2020 feels, we all know that at some point our lives will return to normal. Although we don’t know when that will happen, it’s comforting to know that every stressful season of uncertainty is temporary. Hold on to the knowledge that the stress and anxiety has an expiration date, regardless of how acute it feels today.
Predictability = safety + security.
In order to feel like we are in control, we need two things: safety and security. Without either, our lives tend to feel like they’re spiraling. That’s why 2020 felt so chaotic and traumatic for so many; our daily routines and coping mechanisms were stripped away because of safety concerns.
So whenever you feel out of control with no method to predict what’s coming next, try to ground yourself through safety and security. Create a routine and stick to it. Focus on things that are inside of your control instead of depending on others to follow through.
Hold space for negative emotions.
We as a culture have a problem with toxic positivity. We love to airbrush over troubled times and pretend that everything is peachy keen, even as the world as we know it is crumbling around us.
Combat this urge to gloss over the ugly emotions by embracing them. Give them a name. Understand them. Ask them to come inside and offer them a warm beverage and a salty snack. Welcome them with curiosity and compassion. And once you get to know them, release them back to where they came from.
Accept your reality.
During times of acute uncertainty, it’s almost instinctual to wish for easier times. We love to recreate reality in our imagination in order to cope.
But we can’t change our reality. And when the dissonance between what we wish was reality and what is actually reality comes to a head, it’s easy to feel despondent and depressed.
Don’t set yourself up for failure. Instead, accept the reality of whatever situation you’re in and work to adapt to that. If you continue to force a false narrative on yourself, you’ll spin your wheels until you are forced to surrender. Instead, get creative within your reality.
Simplify your life.
If you try to overwhelm yourself with the complexities of life during any time of uncertainty, you’re just piling it on yourself for absolutely no reason.
Go back to the basics. What do you need to accomplish today? You probably need to get out of bed, feed yourself, clean yourself, clothe yourself, do your job take time for yourself, connect with others and sleep.
Set yourself up for success.
Humans love progression. We like feeling in control of our situations, and we like seeing growth happening right before our eyes. So one of the easiest ways to feel better about yourself during times of acute uncertainty is to create small actionable goals for yourself to cross off a list.
Practice self-care.
Self-care can be defined as anything you do to rest, reset or reflect. At its best, self-care is used to refill your cup. We all need to nourish ourselves and our energy, and the best and fastest way to do this is to engage in self-care.
However, self-care is typically the first thing that goes out the window during times of crisis.
We decide we have to focus on everything else—our jobs, our finances, our families, and our friends. But without caring for ourselves first, the rest of these will inevitably suffer.
Even though it feels impossible, carve out time for yourself. If you neglect yourself, you won’t be able to show up as your full self whenever times are tough.
To everyone feeling hyper-stressed out thanks to a grueling year, uncertainty is never permanent. This will pass. But in the meantime, these tips will help you cope until we are back into our natural routines and rhythms. Stay safe and stay healthy!
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